


Invincible Spirit

by Sabinasan



Category: Yu-Gi-Oh!
Genre: Blindshipping, Character Study, Contest Entry, Fluff, Gap Filler, Guilty Yami Yuugi, M/M, Post Orichalcos Arc, Puzzleshipping, Unspoken words
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-14
Updated: 2015-10-14
Packaged: 2018-04-26 06:22:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4993645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sabinasan/pseuds/Sabinasan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Despite their victory against Dartz, the Spirit of the Puzzle still grapples with the guilt of having let Yuugi down, but there are deeper feelings that he is afraid to share. How fair would it be to complicate the journey to uncovering his memories than it already is with a messy emotion like love?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Invincible Spirit

**Author's Note:**

> Yu-Gi-Oh! belongs to Takahashi Kazuki and others. This fic is inspired by "Fireproof" by One Direction and is an entry in the Best Puzzleshipping Story Contest's Song Challenge. 
> 
> To be true to canon, I will not have Yuugi refer to Atem as Yami. As no one knows his name yet in canon, he will be referred to as 'mou hitori no boku' (the other me) or the Nameless Pharaoh. 
> 
> This story is cross-posted on fanfiction.net.

_The duel had ended, but he barely noticed. He was numb as his mind attempted to process the events of the last ten minutes or so of the battle. He had lost. It wasn't just the fact that he was the loser in this duel, but the revelations that came with it were staggering. He found himself questioning who he was and what had possessed him to ignore his partner and play the Seal of Orichalcos. No matter how much his mind scrambled for an answer, none was forthcoming. It left him feeling dejected and resigned to his fate. This was his just reward for giving in to his weakness._

_As the neon green light of the seal closed in around him, he inhaled deep - his shoulders hunching - held it for a moment, and then exhaled as if he was enjoying the last breath he would take in this world. Who knew when, if ever, he would return to complete his journey to restore his lost memories. He felt the magical pull of the Seal attempting to separate his consciousness from the body. For a moment, he resisted as the primitive part of his brain struggled for survival, but then rational thoughts calmed that instinct, knowing full-well that this was inescapable. No one who lost while the Seal of Orichalcos was in play made it out with their soul still intact._

_Suddenly, there was a shove from behind. It was firm but gentle. He felt his body catapult forward, and his eyes widened in recognition of the fact that his body was in motion. His feet stumbled over themselves and a few loose stones, but he was able to maintain his balance. He immediately noticed that he was no longer within the confines of the Seal. He turned to see what had allowed him to escape._

_Yuugi. That kind, tender soul. He stood in the middle of the circle, his eyes burning bright with determination through the eerie glow of evil magic. Yuugi even smiled at him, which caused the Spirit's hammering heart to jerk to a sudden stop with trepidation. What did he think he was doing?_

_"Aibou!"_

_"I believe in you, mou hitori no boku."_

Shame.

Crimson eyes snapped open at the clenching of his stomach from the gut-wrenching thought of the Seal that tore him apart from Yuugi. For the first time since he had been released from the Puzzle a few years ago, he had been alone. He had been so consumed with the desire to win the duel at all costs that he had been willing to use the Seal of Orichalcos card even though they had discussed that it would not be an option once Rafael had given it to him. It was his arrogance that had forced Yuugi to play the hero and take the place that was meant for him in Dartz's soul collection. If only he hadn't been so naïve as to believe that he was truly pure of heart!

It took a few moments for his eyes to adjust to the darkness of the space around him, and a faint musty stench assailed his nostrils. He was in his soul room. After being absent from its confines for weeks, he had almost forgotten what it was like to be in his soul room. All of the nuances of the place had faded as he had acclimated to the space and now his return to its confines brought back a keen awareness of the room's every detail. His eyes adjusted to the shadows surrounding him, and he listened for any sound in the room. Somewhere in the distance, a drop of water echoed as it dripped into a shallow puddle. He couldn't remember if that had been there previously, and he was determined to discover so later, but right now, he was searching for another sound. Any indication that Yuugi was near the entry to his room. As he strained to make out any noise, a knock was heard reverberating around the sandstone structures of the area. The sound held the dulled clang of metal, which alerted him to the fact that something soft but with some rigidity was the cause of the noise. 

_Yuugi. Oh..._

It had been days since the end of the ordeal with Dartz, and Yuugi had returned to the Hawkins mobile home with his friends in order to recuperate from their adventures before continuing on in their quest to recover the Nameless Pharaoh's lost memories. He had been non-existent during that time. He kept telling himself over and over, like a mantra, that he was distancing himself from everyone because he was _exhausted_. After all, since he had come to inhabit a part of Yuugi's body, he had only held control of it for no more than a few hours at a time. He had never expected to be in control for _weeks_. Yet, he knew if he was going to be honest with himself, he would have to admit that the feeling he experienced upon waking from his nightmare was what kept him from conversing with Yuugi because he knew he would have to come to terms with the depth of his error by talking with the teen.

"Mou hitori no boku!" his voice carried into the room despite being muffled by metal and stone. 

He clenched his eyes at the sound, trying desperately to chase away the ever-growing sense of doom surrounding him. He knew he shouldn't feel this way - Yuugi had forgiven him. Yet, that forgiveness was what kept the spiral of negative thoughts circling his mind to the point of hysteria. He didn't deserve that absolution. If only Yuugi knew...

No. He couldn't know.

"I know you're in there...I just wanted to talk." A beat. "Well, I'm thinking of going for a walk to clear my mind. Please...come out. I know what's bothering you, and I want to set you at ease." Silence descended, and he knew Yuugi had left.

He almost chuckled at that last statement. Of course Yuugi knew. Unlike any other person he had met in the modern world, Yuugi could read him like a well-read book. Yuugi would know he was still feeling deep remorse for what had transpired. The Nameless Pharaoh had learned quite a bit about himself during the past few weeks. He had discovered the true depths of despair, how wrong he had been to assume that he was free of all touch of darkness especially after spending millennia in the Puzzle, his penchant for excessive pride, his cowardice, and finally, the deep-rooted hope and faith in his loved ones that carried him through the darkest of times. Despite learning this one very good thing about himself, he still found himself wallowing in negative thoughts. Why did he feel he deserved none of the kindness Yuugi had shown him?

The Nameless Pharaoh knew exactly why, and it all stemmed from his inability to fully understand Yuugi. He knew he had deserved disappointment from his partner, which he fully received during the duel in the desert. He had even expected anger and a deep sense of betrayal that would not be easily diminished once the conflict had been resolved. None of these things happened. Instead, Yuugi had _trusted_ him. When it came down to it, he knew Yuugi had the heart of a true warrior. Most people would take one look at his partner and think he was easily taken advantage of, which used to be the case before he came into Yuugi's life. No, most people failed to see the true strength of Yuugi's love for others and the world. How his smile came so easily even during the toughest of situations, his sincere belief that every person has some shred of good in them, the pure determination to complete any task set before him, his joy in the simplest of things (like a hamburger), and his unwavering faith in his friends and good prevailing over evil. Yuugi was the eternal optimist. These things he knew of his partner so well - better than others, in fact - but he couldn't comprehend them. How could one who had faced so much adversity in his life continue to maintain such a positive outlook and only come out of each challenge stronger than the last? Where, in the same situations, the Nameless Pharaoh continued to struggle with his own insecurities, bogged down by the swirling negativity around him on a daily basis.

A part of his melancholia was due to the Shadows that were now a part of him ever since he had been sealed inside the puzzle. They made it difficult for any positivity in his life to last. Though, Yuugi's presence had served to dim the influence of the Shadows, and that was something the Nameless Pharaoh could never thank Yuugi enough for. There were many things he would always be thankful for...but those were to be short-lived. For, he knew it to be true, once he discovered his lost memories and his name, he would return to the Afterlife where he belonged. He could only hope Yuugi's influence would remain with him, but he was uncertain. 

The doorway to his soul room stood before him. The only barrier standing between him and the hallway separating their soul rooms. He could sense that Yuugi had begun his trek away from his friends. The Nameless Pharaoh sighed and closed his eyes in an attempt to steady his emotions. He knew Yuugi was aware of his pervasive regret, and he knew Yuugi wanted to address that. Now, if he could keep that other feeling at bay - the one that made him feel all the worse - he could avoid further complicating their futures. He didn't need to do that...not when he had already taken so much from his partner.

* * * * *

He appeared easily in ethereal form, his back resting against the mighty trunk of a tall tree. He was briefly surprised that he could feel the roughness of the bark, and then felt glad. He had barely taken pleasure in things he had taken advantage of when he was alive previously while he resided in Yuugi's body for those weeks. He had been so consumed by grief and rage at first followed by his total concentration on the task of retrieving the lost souls that he couldn't appreciate soft sheets or the wind blowing through his hair. He knew those were things Yuugi would've taken the time to notice and enjoy, and it was a trait that further endeared his partner to him. Tearing his attention away from the tree, the Nameless Pharaoh caught sight of Yuugi staring at him with a smile.

"Mou hitori no boku! I'm glad to see you!"

His bubbly demeanor was catching, and the Nameless Pharaoh found himself smiling that smile he only saved for his partner. "Same here, Aibou."

"I know it's been busy, and I haven't seen you much...but I...I wanted to thank you for returning my soul to my body."

His eyes became distant as he fought to keep his facial features neutral. "It was the least I could do for betraying your trust."

"That's what I wanted to talk to you about," Yuugi said as he slowly approached the spirit. "I know you've been upset about this whole situation. Jounouchi and Anzu filled me in. How you-"

He couldn't take it anymore. He felt the tears well in his eyes, and if he had been in a different frame of mind, he would've been horrified to be engaging in such a raw display of emotion. They slowly built in his eyes and shutting them only contained the flow of salty tears briefly before they rolled down his cheeks. He continued to be self-absorbed in his pain until a gentle touch - the pad of a thumb - on his cheek, where his tears had made a trail, startled him into the present. He opened his eyes to see the concerned gaze of his partner, and he found himself being drawn helplessly into their depths. 

"Oh...mou hitori no boku..." 

The way the term of endearment rolled off of Yuugi's lips in the quiet tenor of his voice made the Nameless Pharaoh's heart skip a beat, and shivers of pleasure roll through his transparent skin. He wondered at Yuugi's ability to touch him without going through, but then...he realized that he had been able to hold Yuugi's incorporeal form before. _It must be the magical bond between us..._

"I couldn't be angry with you. I was disappointed, but I knew you were doing what you felt was right. You knew so much was at stake and you were willing to do all you could in order to make sure we stayed alive to be able to complete the task set out by Dark Magician Girl. I wish...I wish I had the strength to do something like that."

The Nameless Pharaoh wanted to laugh at the absurdity of Yuugi's statement. How ironic that the one thing Yuugi admired in him, he hated in himself. "I put you in danger. I didn't trust you enough...and I should have. My _pride_..." he choked on the word as if it tasted rancid, "prevented me from thinking logically or trying to dream up a better strategy. I have repaid you poorly for all you have given me."

Yuugi looked puzzled. "What I have given you? All I've done is share my body-"

There it was. That cursed emotion that the Nameless Pharaoh wanted desperately to contain and yet simultaneously set free. He wanted to share the truth behind his deep dejection - the reason why he was eating himself from the inside out.

The Nameless Pharaoh loved Mutou Yuugi.

There...he finally made himself admit it. While not out loud, he finally recognized that this was a feeling he couldn't keep hidden any longer. And it was this emotion that was the most dangerous one of them all that he owned. He was hopelessly in love with Yuugi so much so that his betrayal of using the Orichalcos struck so much deeper in his heart. Would someone who loved Yuugi that much do something so stupid? He was sure the answer was no, but he was also sure that no one else loved or could love Yuugi the way he did...because no one knew him like he did. He supposed that's what happened when two people shared a body and soul for so long. 

The Nameless Pharaoh looked into those eyes and saw a question within them. He realized that Yuugi had continued speaking and he hadn't heard a single word. "What?" he asked inelegantly.

Yuugi laughed. "All I said was that I haven't done much for you, and it would be unfair of me to repay your efforts with anger."

He found himself wondering if he had ever loved. Through what few memories he did have and what information he had gathered from others - Ishizu being an example - the Nameless Pharaoh was able to piece together that he had known he had a destiny to save Egypt and had died young defending the country he ruled. Did he have time then for pursuits of the heart? He suspected not. A deep part of him knew that if his former self had known that he was doomed to live a short life, he would have avoided any sort of relationship. He suspected his former self would have felt that it was noble to avoid romantic entanglement when he knew it could not last. And that is what he felt right now. Logically, he knew he was in a similar situation, and his time with Yuugi was limited. While it would feel wonderful in the short-term to give in to romance, he knew in a few months' time that he would leave Yuugi crushed. And that, he resolved, was something he would never allow himself to do.

"Mou hitori no boku?"

The Nameless Pharaoh turned his gaze away briefly, deciding then that he needed to compromise to keep himself from bursting on the inside from all the pent-up emotion. He would refrain from any overt declarations of love and be content with just spending time with Yuugi. He would take care to treasure every moment he had left with the teen. He would learn what he could from Yuugi in terms of having more faith in himself and his ability to do good for himself, those he loved, and the world. Mostly, he wanted to show Yuugi that he could be worthy of Yuugi's esteem and affection. The Nameless Pharaoh returned his gaze to Yuugi's and that special smile lit up his face once more.

"You have done more for me than you will ever know."

Yuugi stepped back and flopped himself on the ground beside the Nameless Pharaoh, his arms cradling the back of his head. Their legs touched briefly, and the Nameless Pharaoh stiffened briefly before allowing himself pleasure at this small bit of contact. This would have to be enough for him, even though he craved more. He had to remind himself that asking for more would be selfish, and that was something he couldn't be any longer.

"I forgave you...because it's more damaging to hold on to all that...negative energy. Besides, that's what you're supposed to do when you care about someone, right? Forgive them and move on."

The Nameless Pharaoh nodded. "Yes. I...want you to know that I have learned from my mistake. I will no longer doubt you, and I will trust your instincts more than I did."

Yuugi looked up at him. "That's all I ask...that you've learned from this. As I have."

"And what did you learn, Aibou?"

Yuugi grinned. "That no one knows you the way I do."

The Nameless Pharaoh chuckled, wondering at the strength and wisdom of the teen lying beside him. _And only I know...you must be fireproof._


End file.
